Why all this New Girl nonsense has to stop

New Girl is a massively popular comedy show from the US, it features Zooey Deschanel and three unknown other male actors who play along with her adorable whimsy and kookyness. This is supposed to be a show to provide us mere mortals with a taste of these hipsters regular lifestyle, it's not. This is a show with four people saying "look at me, I'm fucking mental, look how different I am! I'm amazing". I may just be overacting a bit but this show, like many other comedy shows around at the moment are showing us people wanting to be different to everyone else but just come off looking tragic.

Mole Escape review

Personally, while digging through the endless lists of games and apps in the App Store I find it massively difficult to find anything worth playing, I've played Angry Birds, Fruit Ninja and Plants v Zombies to death and really wanted another high quality and addictive app to play, luckily I stumbled onto the games of Adult Swim and for the first time in a long time I was impressed. My current favourite of the current free apps from the company is this, Super Mole Escape. The premise is the classic endless scrolling escape game, but that's where the similarities to other apps of this kind ends. Super Mole Escape is gripping, collect gems, buy other moles, each with their own identity and dress code, you dig, you fly, you fire missiles, these moles don't take any shit. One of the best free apps I've played in a long time and I couldn't recommend it more.

Appearing on iPhone 3GS, 4, 4S, 5 and iPad.

https://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/super-mole-escape/id517069954?mt=8

The characters of Friends were vile creatures

Watching back old episodes of Friends conjures up all manner of feelings, it brings you back to the 90's, a simpler time. For me Friends incites anger within me, the characters infuriate me with their behaviour and attitudes, in this I will go through why.

Let's start with Monica, up there with the very worst of the character, selfish, irritating, greedy, smug and literally glad to step over any other person to get what she wants. Another thing has caught my eye, she's overly touchy with her brother, Ross. For instance, in the episode where kooky Phoebe pops out her brothers kids we see Monica sitting on Ross's lap in the hospital, or the one in London, where Ross put's his head on Monica's lap, as seen here;

 

Not only this, remember Jon Favreau's character, Pete. Monica saw poor Pete, kinda ugly and desperate and was like, no, no relationship, then found out he had money and then he was amazing. Tacky and cheap.

Next we move onto Ross. Ross spent his teenage years and into his twenties being an unloved nerdy virgin, suddenly, he turns his wife gay then he's a lad about town, first up we have Julie, while with Julie Ross decides he wants Rachel again, so he kisses her. Bare in mind Rachel had turned this little nerd down time after time while he was younger. Suddenly Ross doesn't know who he wants, Rachel or Julie, so he writes a list, obviously... Perfectly leading us into:

Rachel, seeing the list loses her shit and decides, fuck Ross, he was leaving his girlfriend for me but the fucker did write a list. She then goes on to use everyone in her path, Ruining any chance Ross had with his second wife Emily by turning up to his wedding uninvited. Don't worry though, they have a kid together then she decides fuck it, I don't care about leaving my friends and family, I'm going to Paris until she gets Ross down on his knees begging her to stay.

Moving on, Chandler, oh Chandler, he's kind of pathetic. Janice is married, getting a divorce, Chandlers in there. Then she wants to go back to her family but Chandler begs her not to, kinda twattish of him. He gets with a depressed and drunk Monica at her brother's wedding and continues to wear her down til Stockholm Syndrome kicks in and she identifies with her kidnapper. 

The creation of a squirrel everyone can look up to

Yesterday I was having a twitter back and forth with my sister and told her I need her tears in a jam jar for a friend of mine, she's asked who the friend was, panicked I said Simon, and that Simon is a squirrel. Now, rather than just admit that I'm slightly too imaginative or maybe a bit schizophrenic I made said squirrel a Twitter account, this twitter account has now gained 19 followers within a day, it's not much but it's a start, I have so far been told I'm the next big twing (that's the next big twitter thing I've been informed), I've had retweets, favourites and direct emails giving me free downloads of up and coming rappers and musicians.

Simon Squirelle is born, and he's here to spread his opinion and his nuts across anyone who disagrees with him's face.

The King Blues and their impact on me

The King Blues were a politically motivated ska-punk band, infusing a plethora of genres including hip hop, rap, dubstep and even doo wop. Over their eight year history they released 4 studio albums, 5 EPs and a handful of singles, though never reaching the mainstream they became a huge name within their genre and reaching the attention of alternative music magazines, radio stations and bloggers world wide.

Throughout their history their line up changed substantially from album to album, they began as a two man set up with Jonny Fox, or Itch as he has become known, performing vocals and playing ukulele and Jamie Jazz on acoustic guitar and additional vocals. They later expanded to a full line up including drums and bass. Their first album release, being 'Under The Fog' released first in 2006, then with re-releases in both 2007 and 2008 with adjusted track listings. This was followed by 'Save The World Get The Girl' in 2008, 'Punk And Poetry' in 2011 and their final album 'Long Live The Struggle' in 2012 shortly after their split.

The band's message has come from their own personal histories. From a young age, lead singer Jonny Fox was made homeless, Living in squats with other homeless he learnt about punk music and it's history, he learnt of how the government pretty much does nothing for the homeless or the poor and uses the people for their own personal agendas. Obviously this had a profound effect on the young Jonny fox and lead him to write music about the state of the country, the people who run it, the banks and the police, as well as his own experiences and personal beliefs which often lead the narrative of their tracks, for example Everything Happens for a Reason, Let's Hang The Landlord, Five Bottles Of Shampoo and Wasted Words.

The band had a close relationship with other bands in the same and similar genres, touring with Sonic Boom Six, The Skints, King Prawn and others over their career, also featuring on the ska-punk collective 'Suicide Bid'.

Since the band has split both Jonny Fox and Jamie Jazz have go on to new projects with Jonny Fox beginning his solo career as 'Itch' and Jamie with his new band 'Bleach Blood' which also features 'The Automatic's' Paul Mullen.

Itch started his solo project on Red Bull Records with the release of an EP, 'The Manifesto Pt 1: How To Fucking Rule At Life', free of charge featuring four tracks; London is Burning, Spooky Kids, True and Bruises. This was followed by 'The Manifesto Pt: We're All In The Gutter', again being released for free and featuring 4 tracks; Diplomat, Soul, Like I'm Drugs and We're All In The Gutter. Both I found to be amazing pieces of work, they have been followed up by a UK only track 'Best Shot' and a US track 'Homeless Romantic' featuring Adam Lazzara. with an album to follow later in the year, all this while performing at The Great Escape festival in Brighton and Slam Dunk in Wolverhampton, Leeds and Hatfield, Hertfordshire. After this came Camden Rocks, this may have been Itchs most memorable solo gig to date based solely on the fact he jumped from the first floor of the Jazz Café and broke his leg, leaving him in a wheelchair while it heals. Even this has not prevented him from continuing to tour, he has performed almost every date of the Warped Tour throughout the US.

Jamie has continued his career with Bleach Blood signed to Transmission Records. They are a four piece punk band with an ever growing following and and EP and two singles already behind them, a support slot on a UK tour with the now defunct band Sharks. They've also played headline shows at The Water Rats in Kings Cross and a club night called Omega in The Finsbury, north east London. Their first EP 'The Young Heartbreakers Club EP', the EP contains four tracks, Let Your Heart Sing, Bleached Blood, The Young Heartbreakers Club and I Was Born In A Rave. This was followed by the single Anything Anything and another single Hope. The complete album will be released later this year or earlier next year, with heavy radio play and impressive support slots Bleach Blood are sure to find a loyal fanbase in time and have a bright future ahead.

I think what makes this band so important to me is that they show that no matter where you come from there's always a chance to get somewhere in life as long as you're committed and passionate and will work to  change things and people's opinions. Before I listened to them I was oblivious to politics, I had no idea how corrupt the country is and the people who run it. I'm now much more aware, I'm far more vocal in my beliefs and equality, so much so I will argue with people while quoting The King Blues lyrics to them. This band has made it impossible for me to ignore intolerance and ignorance, for a band to make me this passionate they had to have done something right. Their message is something that has had a huge impact on my life, with this message being carried on with Itchs solo project and Jamie still making brilliant music with Bleach Blood, The King Blues legacy will continue for years and years to come.

Current Boom material, still brilliant, just 7 years older. Sonic Boom Six - Keep On Believing

They don't age, they mature, except Bowen, he just looks closer and closer to his coffin.

Sonic Boom Six - Piggy in the Middle

This was the second Sonic Boom Six track I heard back in the summer of 06, I remember it being played by someone during a music class demanding it was bluetoothed to me (remember when that was thing? Twas ridiculous wasn't it, took forever, awkward conversation while it was sending and the horrible moment when it was rejected because of an error or lack of memory at the end). Anyway, slightly off topic there, luckily it was successful, I listened to it on repeat for hours, opening my eyes to a whole new genre of music which, to this day I still love above all else. Ska-hip hop-dub rap metal fusion, describe it to anyone who's never heard Sonic Boom Six or anything similar and expect some blank faces.

RIP Sharks. No idea why it's over but okay, your shout

Reading ham man

Reading is a place of many interesting characters, spend an afternoon in The Oracle and you're sure to see someone doing something odd, dressed utterly ridiculously or just talking to their selves.

Today I will focus entirely on who I like to refer to as 'The Ham man of Reading town'.

So, I start my day slowly, getting shit from the student finance desk morons for them not setting me up a direct debit, asking what to do, not receiving a straight answer, usual procedure from one of the best companies I've ever used. 

I decide I've had enough, I need to get out, I realize my life consists of laying in someone else's bed waiting for Tesco time, by Tesco time I mean wandering around Tesco deciding what experimental food I want to try that night. I wander down the road, jump on the bus and head on down. By the time I've reached The Oracle I see the bus has filled out slightly, then arrives the hero of this tale, our very own Harry Potter, 'Ham man'. 

Open any normal person's work bag you'll find the following;

Notepad

Pen

Lunch box

Mobile phone charger

Perhaps a laptop/tablet

Work files etc.

Our hero however does not follow the mainstream, he's sick of these constraints, why is it acceptable to carry reformed tree mush around (paper, if you're wondering what I'm talking about) but not delicious thinly sliced pork, crumbed because, why the fuck not? So out comes the ham, rolled up slices for ease of access, that's right people, no fucking around here. By this point we're about half a pack down and it's time for a break, what do you wash ham down with? Morgan's spiced rum and coke? Yeah, that's the ticket.

Now what can we say about this? Do we say he's a freak? Perhaps, or maybe he's just the only one who's actually doing what we all want to do, maybe he's a visionary, I doubt it but we shouldn't just write him off. 

So there you have it, next time you're on your way home and waiting for a bus, maybe you're a little peckish, why not grab some ham and a can of rum and coke? you'll get weird looks the first couple of times but it's sure to catch on, then who's going to be the one ahead of the game.

Bleach Blood - Hope, new track.

Itch - Manifesto - Part 1 Review

Itch - Manifesto - Part 1 Review

Lets begin by stating the obvious, it doesn't all sound like The King Blues, it’s not as good as the first two King Blues albums but it is still Itch. The King Blues may no longer be a band but this carries the same message as the band carried from the beginning, however diluted it may have become by the end.

Back to the EP, Itch has clearly gone all out to show his anger in the track ‘London is Burning’, he shouts over a fairly aggressive almost dubstep backing. It sounds like he’s given up on his cause, he know longer feels anything can be done about the corruption of the country. It’s a little repetitive throughout and is the weakest track on the EP in my opinion, it was the first track previewed ahead of the EP’s release and almost completely put me off, however it has grown on my over time, it’s the ‘We Are Fucking Angry’ track, angry for the cause but comes across as angry to be angry.

The next track is ‘Spooky Kids’, thus far the only track to have an actual music video and not just a lyric video. Again it’s a fairly repetitive track, Itch is angry still about the state of things, he’s in support of the youth of Britain. It’s intended as the stand out track on the EP, it’s the one that’s clearly being pushed as a potential single, it’s not my track but again it’s a very strong effort.

The next track is ‘True’, in which Itch attacks movies and what they have told him about how the world works. This track goes along as a slower, more traditional King Blues track with a very confusing burst of ‘London Is Burning’. It’s one of the stronger tracks of the EP based around the vocals which aren't overly angry for the sake of it. It’s a change from the angry two tracks from the album, other than the very confusing burst of ‘London is Burning’.

And now on to the the final and in my opinion best track from the EP. It’s a return to the roots of the original King Blues stuff, punky, ska-y and completely restored my faith in Johnny ‘Itch’ Fox. Featuring Tim Armstrong of Operation Ivy and Rancid only added to the quality of the track. No unnecessary anger, shouting or heavy banging backing tracks, it sounds like The King Blues, it’s obviously ridiculous to think that everything done will sound like The King Blues but he shouldn't lose every aspect that gained him his fans to begin with. 

Overall I rate this EP highly, it shows Itch is willing to take risks but still show his old self, it shows he still hasn't given up on his cause and finally it shows that he can still make quality music, after the final King Blues album I had lost some faith in Itch’s ability to make music to the brilliance that was ‘Under The Fog’, while this still doesn't touch that it’s heading in the right direction.

Icondom

Icondom, proving people will actually download anything...

First...